Dreading tomorrow

I'm dreading tomorrow.  It'll be the 2nd of 7 hemo sessions that I'll be doing, and I am hoping that it will be nothing like it was on Monday when I did the 1st session.

My current schedule is set up for 3:00pm on Monday, Wednesday and Friday, but called yesterday morning and had an earlier slot so I took it, and it started at 11.  As soon as I got on the machine, I started to feel yucky.  That first hour on the machine was truly horrible, with 11 alarms.  My arterial pressure kept fluctuating, and they ended up switching the lines twice.  This catheter seems really sensitive and it got to the point where I felt like I couldn't move at all or else it would trigger an alarm.  And THEN I started to feel REALLY bad.  I could feel my chest tingling and getting really heavy, and then I started burping, and I just knew that I was going to throw up.  I got the nurse over to my chair (because she was clearing another alarm) and she was able to get me a trash bag to vomit in.  I apologized profusely for being the problem child that day.  it's not awesome to be back at dialysis and beeping and throwing up all over the place.  Like I said, hopefully tomorrow is nothing like it.

I'm hoping that all of the drama was because I was dehydrated and they were trying to pull fluid.  I'm not sure why they were trying at the beginning, as I came in at a weight of 64.7kg.  I had done PD the night before and woke up at 73.7kg.  My dry weight is 65kg, so they really shouldn't have tried to pull any fluid off but regardless they did.  As soon as they stopped (and after I threw up) the run got progressively better with fewer alarms, but I still felt as awful as I remember feeling last year around this time.  It's like the worst case of the chills, only it's all on the inside.  I was telling my friend, Julia, today that I don't think I explain it very well as "vibrating" doesn't sound truly awful, but it is.  You can't see it from the outside, but I swear you'd see water rings around me if you put me in a pool!!

I couldn't drive home so I'm glad Joacim has been able to stay with me.  That felt like the longest drive home, and it's only 17 miles from the center to my house. As soon as I got home, I went straight upstairs, got my heating pad and went to bed.  I couldn't sleep, which kinda sucked because that's all I wanted to do. I laid in bed from 3:30-9:30pm.  I did get up to sit in the bathtub for a little bit, but that was it.  I ate a hard bread sandwich around 9:00pm.  I watched a LOT of HGTV and the Food Network.  And I just felt awful for most of it.  I just wanted relief.

And I got it when I woke up this morning.  I felt so much better.  Maybe it's because I felt SO AWFUL yesterday that this morning was such a pleasant surprise.  I even treated myself to a mani/pedi today!

I want to thank you all for sending kind words and support over on FB.  I do feel much better today, but tomorrow will probably pretty awful again.  That's how this thing will probably go...M/W/F will be awful day, and I'll try to make up for it on Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday and Sunday.  Ugh...it's always a roller coaster.